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Dogs

Sep 2006Chance that a British veterinarian says he or she has treated a drunk dog: 1 in 4
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Halifax Pet Insurance (West Yorkshire, U.K.)

Jan 2006Estimated amount spent in the United States each year to treat ACL injuries in dogs: $1,320,000,000
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Vicki L. Wilke, Iowa State University (Ames)

Dec 2005Minimum number of insurgent attacks in Iraq since November 2003 using explosive-carrying dogs or donkeys: 6
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Harper’s research

Feb 2005Bail set in December for a Gainesville, Florida, man accused of biting a dog: $25,000
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Alachua County Jail (Gainesville, Fla.)

May 2001Length, in millimeters, of an I.D. microchip that Singapore now implants in the necks of all imported dogs: 13
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Efre Far East (Singapore)

Mar 2000Number of Parisians who break bones or are hospitalized each year after slipping on dog feces: 650
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Office of the Mayor (Paris)

Dec 1999Number of dogs and whores of whom Yasir Arafat is the son, according to Syria's defense minister: 120,000
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Associated Press Television News Library (London)

Jun 1999Number of pups that Bob Dole's dog Leader has sired with Strom Thurmond's dog Chelsea Marie: 8
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Office of Senator Strom Thurmond (Washington)

Apr 1998Amount that the Paula Jones Legal Fund has spent since 1994 on “pet care” for a dog named Mitzie: $95
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“President Clinton's Opposition to Motions of Paula Jones et al.,” served in U.S. District Court, 11/13/97

February 12, 2008Patty Hearst attended the Westminster Kennel Club dog show with Diva, her French bulldog. “When people find out it's me,” said Hearst, a veteran of the Symbionese Liberation Army, “it's like it doesn't make sense.”
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Star Tribune

September 13, 2007 Yale University exhibited tools used by Ivan Pavlov to measure dog drool, including one saliometer given as a gift to the daughter of a Yale professor.
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Hartford Courant

August 30, 2007Deceased real estate mogul Leona Helmsley left a $12 million bequest to her dog, a small white Maltese named Trouble.
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New York Daily News

June 22, 2007In Idaho, a black Labrador drove his owner's Chevy Impala into a river.In Idaho, a black Labrador drove his owner's Chevy Impala into a river.
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AP via Philly.com

May 17, 2007 Arizona dogs were advised to not swallow hallucinogenic toads.
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Tucson Citizen

March 23, 2007After two black Labrador retrievers sniffed out a shipment of nearly a million black-market DVDs in Johor, Malaysian disc pirates offered a bounty to anyone who kills the dogs, which were on loan from the Motion Picture Association of America. Lucky and Flo were subsequently moved to a safe house.
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AP via Canadian press

February 9, 2007Organized dog fighting was increasingly popular throughout central Russia. Stanislav Mikhailov, president of the All-Russian Association of Russian Volkodavs (“wolf-killers”) said, “Only people who have not seen it, and do not understand it, dislike this.”
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NY Times

January 5, 2007The FDA approved Slentrol, a weight loss drug for dogs.
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USA Today

December 1, 2006Poor Zimbabweans were happily eating dog food.
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Institute for war and peace reporting

November 27, 2006 South Korea's Agriculture Ministry announced plans to kill all the cats and dogs in Iksan, Korea. Minister Kim Chang-sup defended the action, undertaken in response to an outbreak of avian flu, by saying, “Other countries do it. They just don't talk about it.”
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New York Times

November 16, 2006A study found that people with vicious dogs, like pit bulls, have more criminal convictions than people who own nice dogs, like beagles and collies.
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Reuters

October 10, 2006Right-wing columnist Christopher Hitchens confessed that he had eaten a dog.
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Daily Mirror

October 6, 2006Dog-feces-cleanup franchises were opening across the United States. It's the “best job in the world,” said Matt Boswell, the Chief Excrement Officer of Texas-based Pet Butler, which operates in 14 states.
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The Seattle Times

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MSNBC

September 7, 2006Joseph Lieberman returned to the Senate for the first time since losing the Connecticut Democratic primary, and Senator Susan Collins (R., Maine) offered to buy him a dog.
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Washington Post

August 30, 2006A woman in Hohhot, China, crashed her car into another vehicle while allowing her dog to drive.
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Guardian

August 1, 2006In Japan, on the Day of the Dog, Princess Kiko prayed for the safe delivery of her third child.
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BBC

August 1, 2006In China 50,000 dogs died in Yunnan province when government-authorized “killing teams” crept into villages at night and beat the dogs to death.
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Local6.com

July 31, 2006Hot weather killed 141 people (as well as 25,000 cattle and 700,000 fowl) in California, at least 170 people in France, Italy, and Spain, and dozens of racing dogs in Oregon, and shut down MySpace.
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CBS

July 21, 2006A school headmaster in China burned down 10 classrooms when the dog meat he was cooking burst into flames.
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The Australian

July 18, 2006 Wolf-dogs attacked and killed a woman in Greensburg, Pennsylvania.
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Local 6.com

July 11, 2006Bees killed four dogs in Florida.
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Local 6

June 2, 2006A U.S. soldier was sentenced to 90 days' hard labor for threatening a prisoner at Abu Ghraib with a dog in 2003. “You can . . . end up losing the whole dang war,” said the prosecuting attorney, “basically for boneheaded decisions and misjudgments.”
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The Washington Post

May 19, 2006A kennel was ordered closed in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, after a cockapoo was found with yeast in both of its ears.
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Lancaster Online

May 3, 2006Prince Henrik of Denmark, honorary president of the Danish Dachshund Club, told an interviewer that he enjoys eating dogs.
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The New York Sun

April 28, 2006A couple in Milford Township, Pennsylvania, were suing a veterinarian for faking the death of their dog and then giving the dog to someone else.
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Mcall.com

April 4, 2006Someone was mutilating and killing the dogs of Superior Township, Michigan.
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WHIO-TV

March 25, 2006A poodle rapist in Phoenix, Arizona, remained at large.
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KOLD

March 2, 2006 Global warming forced the organizers of Alaska's Iditarod dogsled race to move the race 30 miles north.
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Reuters

March 1, 2006At least 65 dogs in the President's security detail were put up at a five-star hotel in New Delhi; hotel staff were told to address the dogs as "sergeant" or "major."
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New Kerala

January 1, 2006 Hunters in Spain were killing 50,000 hunting greyhounds each year by drowning, poisoning, and hanging them; those greyhounds that “humiliate” their owners by failing to win races or catch hares are often hanged in such a way that their paws barely touch the ground, and as they struggle against the noose, the dogs' nails make a clacking noise. This is known as “the typewriting death.”
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The Guardian

December 31, 2005A police officer in Fremont, California, was attacked by a pack of chihuahuas and was later treated for ankle bites.
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AP

December 19, 2005An Ohio man named Wayne Green was suing a police drug dog for illegal search. “They've got a mean ol' dog,” he explained. “You know what I'm saying?” The dog, Andi, signed with a paw print when served with the complaint.
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CourtTV.com

December 17, 2005A passerby found 30 dog heads in a Tokyo moat.
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Japan Today

December 1, 2005In Russia a pack of squirrels attacked and, according to an eyewitness, “literally gutted” a large dog that was barking at them. When humans approached the squirrels ran away, some carrying flesh.
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BBC News

November 24, 2005In South Korea geneticist Hwang Woo-suk, who cloned an Afghan hound named Snuppy, resigned as chairman of the World Stem Cell Hub after it was discovered that he had used the eggs of women from his research team in experiments. “We needed a lot of ova for the research,” he explained, “but there were not enough ova around.”
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BBC News

November 4, 2005In Finland a dog named Sonar sniffed out her 95th drowned corpse.
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Reuters

October 13, 2005A Maine woman admitted to drowning her boyfriend's dachshund Dewey in a bathtub with the help of a friend. “Erin,” said an assistant county attorney, “was very, very jealous of Dewey.”
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Yahoo News

September 22, 2005A man in Butte, Montana, was charged with killing and beheading a dog, then throwing the severed head at the dog’s owner. "Here," said the man, "is your f------- dog back."
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The Independent Record

September 14, 2005In Spokane, Washington, a man was in trouble for breaking into another man's house and smearing the man's naked, sleeping body with chocolate frosting, then opening a dog pen in the hope that a dog would eat the frosting.
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KXLY.com

August 5, 2005A British man was in trouble for attacking his wife with a pike. He later fed the pike to his cats and dogs.
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Mirror.co.uk

August 3, 2005In South Korea, scientists cloned an Afghan hound. The clone is named Snuppy, for Seoul National University Puppy.
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AP

August 2, 2005A surprising number of dogs were jumping to their deaths from a bridge in Milton, Scotland, but no one knew why. "Everything dogs do is for a reason," said a perplexed animal behaviorist. "They're not stupid like we are."
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Tallahassee Democrat

July 19, 2005A British court, acting under the legal principle of “universal jurisdiction,” convicted a man named Faryadi Zardad on torture charges for events that took place while Zardad lived in Afghanistan, where he would often unleash a “human dog”--a crazed man he kept in a hole--on captives he was holding for ransom. In London, where he has lived since 1998, Zardad ran a pizza parlor.
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GlobeAndMail.com

July 15, 2005A St. Charles, Illinois, man was accused of seducing an Akita through a chain-link fence.
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Daily Herald

June 27, 2005Scientists in Pittsburgh killed a dog, then resurrected it hours later with fresh blood.
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News.com.au

June 20, 2005In Spartanburg, South Carolina, a man was caught molesting a dog. “He had his pants down,” said the owner of the dog, “and he was doing sexual activity with the dog like a man would do to a woman.” The dog, Princess, later died of related injuries.
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Fox Carolina

June 6, 2005A care worker at a Japanese mental home was arrested for unleashing feral dogs to keep patients in their rooms.
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Mainichi Daily News

May 24, 2005A San Diego doctor was training a dog named Ginger to detect cancer by sniffing human urine.
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Sign On San Diego

May 12, 2005In Utah, a high school teacher brought his class to see the dissection of a live dog. “I thought,” he said, “that it would be just really a good experience.”
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Local6.com

March 13, 2005 Israel was preparing to attack Iran's nuclear facilities with helicopters, guns, and dogs.
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Times Online

March 2, 2005A toddler was lost in the Alabama woods; police, firemen, and family friends searched for him in vain. Finally, he was rescued by a three-legged dog.
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NBC 13

February 23, 2005In Edinburgh, Scotland, a blind man bit his guide dog.
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The Scotsman

February 18, 2005 dogsDogs in Australia were licking toads to get high.
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The World News

January 12, 2005A police officer in the Philippines was accused of stealing a fellow officer's bomb-sniffing dog, then eating it.
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Sun Star Davao

January 10, 2005A Florida man, upset over hurricanes, beat a puppy with a hammer.
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St. Petersburg Times

January 5, 2005Iraq's thirteen police dogs weren't getting enough to eat,
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WYFF

November 19, 2004Web publishers were upset with the White House for denying them the right to host a Christmastime video of Barney the dog; the White House insisted that the publishers link to the video instead of hosting it themselves. Last year's video, “Barney Reloaded,” which featured Karl Rove draped in Christmas lights, brought 24 million visitors to the White House website.
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News.com

November 10, 2004All around the world, dogs were doing yoga.
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Animal Planet

July 14, 2004A first draft of the dog genome was released.
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NIH

July 9, 2004The mayor of Nyahururu, Kenya, ordered the slaughter of 500 pigs because they were mating with stray dogs.
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Reuters

July 8, 2004People in Canberra, Australia, were warned to beware of mad starving kangaroos; at least one golden retriever has been drowned by a kangaroo, and a woman was attacked while out walking her poodle.
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Associated Press

May 19, 2004The Humane Society complained that racing dogs in Florida were being given cocaine.
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Associated Press

April 26, 2004It was discovered that pheromones that mimic those emitted by lactating bitches soothe misbehaving dogs by reminding them of their puppyhoods.
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New Scientist

April 15, 2004A man in Ocala, Florida, was in trouble after his fiancée caught him raping her rottweiler dog.
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Ocala Star Banner

March 31, 2004Scientists found that purebred dogs really do resemble their owners but that mutts do not.
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New Scientist

November 6, 2003A dog shot a man in France.
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Reuters

October 25, 2003 FBI agents at the Norfolk, Virginia, airport took anal swabs from a mechanical farting dog to make sure it did not contain explosives.
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BBC

October 16, 2003A German man who taught his dog, Adolf, to perform the Nazi salute by raising its right paw escaped prosecution for the trick.
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New York Times

September 11, 2003The government of Cambodia was urging people to eat stray dogs.
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CNN.com

August 13, 2003Sylvester Stallone's mother said that her dogs, which she believes to be psychic, have predicted a victory for Arnold Schwarzenegger in the California recall election, and an apocalyptic Christian preacher named Jack Van Impe claimed that he had been contacted by Condoleezza Rice, who he said asked him for an outline of what the end of the world will be like.
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MSNBC.com

July 11, 2003Mrs. Bush read a book about Clifford the big red dog to some HIV-infected children in Uganda; the children responded with a song: "AIDS has no mercy to the youth," they sang. "We all die young."
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Reuters

July 1, 2003The British House of Commons voted to ban fox hunting with dogs.
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New York Times

May 11, 2003Federal authorities said that they will permit passengers to take cats, dogs, and other animals, including monkeys, on airplanes for emotional support but not snakes, rodents, or spiders.
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Reuters

April 29, 2003 Four American soldiers were arrested for stealing $900,000 from the $800 million they happened upon near abandoned Baghdad palaces and dog kennels.
April 8, 2003 The Pekingese that won the Crufts dogshow in Birmingham, England, was accused of having had a face-lift.
March 4, 2003 Iraq crushed four Al Samoud 2 missiles with a bulldozer; Hans Blix said that the decision to destroy the missiles was a “very significant piece of real disarmament.” A pack of dogs attacked six parked cars in Munich.
January 28, 2003 A Virginia man who was trying to beat his dog to death with a shotgun accidentally shot himself to death.
December 17, 2002 A police dog in St. Petersburg, Florida, bit off a robbery suspect's penis.
October 29, 2002 Dogs, scientists found, are better behaved when listening to Bach than when listening to Metallica.
October 22, 2002 An Iranian cleric declared a jihad on dog owners: “I demand the judiciary arrest all dogs with long, medium, or short legs together with their long-legged owners.”
September 24, 2002 The World Sheepdog Trials in Bala, Wales, were disrupted by a low-flying military jet.
August 20, 2002 A number of videotapes made by Al Qaeda were discovered; several contained footage of dogs being killed by what appeared to be chemical weapons, and one contained a documentary in which Osama bin Laden called Saddam Hussein a bad Muslim.
May 7, 2002 Restaurateurs in Korea were planning to offer “dog meat juice” to foreigners outside the World Cup stadium in Seoul. “We plan to develop canned dog meat tonic juice, which football fans can enjoy in their stadium seats,” said Choi Han-Gwon, the head of an association of dog meat restaurants.
April 30, 2002 Sales of deer, goat, and dog penis were down in China due to the popularity of Viagra.
April 16, 2002 “We won't leave until there is a surrender agreement with the terrorists there inside.” An Israeli tank brigade in the West Bank adopted a stray dog and named it “George W. Bush” because it “barks a lot” but is “useless.” There were many reports of atrocities by Israeli troops as they destroyed the Jenin refugee camp in the West Bank; witnesses reported scores of civilian casualties, bodies littering the streets, buildings demolished with families inside.
March 26, 2002 A woman whose dog mauled a neighbor to death was convicted of second-degree murder.
March 12, 2002 Israeli veterinarians were giving Valium to nervous dogs to soothe their panic attacks.
January 8, 2002 Buddy Clinton, the former First Dog, was killed in a Westchester County, New York, cul-de-sac by an S.U.V.
August 28, 2001 Iranian police launched a crackdown on “flagrant manifestations of corruption,” including selling pet dogs, playing loud music, and displaying women's underwear in shop windows.
June 26, 2001A Chilean boy was found living with a pack of wild dogs in Talcahuano; the boy, who had lived with the dogs for two years, described nursing from a pregnant bitch when he was unable to find water.
May 8, 2001 Alabama's senate approved a bill that would allow video gambling machines to be installed at dog tracks.
May 8, 2001 Dogs in Montreal were pissing on a crab-apple tree planted in honor of the late Pierre Trudeau.
May 1, 2001American police dogs were being outfitted with titanium teeth.
May 1, 2001Brigitte Bardot was extremely upset that the mayor of Bucharest, Romania, was killing stray dogs instead of putting them up for adoption as the aging actress had demanded; she accused the mayor of tyranny.
April 10, 2001Two beggars in Chisinau, Moldova, were arrested for selling human body parts, which were apparently taken from a cancer clinic, as dog food.
April 3, 2001Marjorie Knoller, a San Francisco lawyer whose dog Bane killed a young woman who lived next door, was indicted for second-degree murder, involuntary manslaughter, and failure to control a mischievous animal that causes a death.
April 3, 2001Her husband was indicted on similar charges; officials were investigating whether the couple, who have adopted an adult convict as their son, had been sexually abusing the dog.
March 27, 2001 Animals without Borders was shipping stray dogs from Romania to Belgium and France to prevent them from being killed in a campaign to remove 200,000 strays from the streets of Bucharest.
March 13, 2001A dead infant was found in the jaws of a dog in Brooklyn.
March 6, 2001Brigitte Bardot was trying to save 200,000 mangy stray dogs in Bucharest, Romania, that bite over 20,000 people a year.
January 9, 2001 Taiwan banned the eating of dogs and cats.
November 28, 2000 Queen Elizabeth II was photographed wringing the neck of a wounded pheasant which a hunting dog had dropped at her feet; British animal-rights types were appalled. At church the next day, the Queen wore a red hat accented with pheasant feathers.
November 14, 2000South African television broadcast a 1998 training video showing black prisoners being mauled repeatedly by police dogs as they begged for mercy; six white policemen were arrested shortly thereafter.
September 19, 2000A study by the American Veterinary Medical Association concluded that Rottweiler dogs now kill more people than do pit bulls.
September 12, 2000While in Japan, the Russian president was serenaded by a robot dog that sang the Russian national anthem.

    JULY 2008

    HIGH NOON FOR THE REPUBLICAN PARTY
    Why the G.O.P. Must Die
    A Forum with Kevin Baker, Scott McConnell, Kevin Phillips, and Thomas Schaller

    THE MAGIC OLYMPICS
    With Tricks Explained!
    By Alex Stone

    THE CASE OF THE SEVERED HAND
    A story by Robert Coover

    Also: J.G. Ballard: The Boy from Shanghai