Weekly Review

By Margaret Cordi

The wire master and his puppets, 1875.

As the United States marked the eighth anniversary of its war in Afghanistan, General Stanley McChrystal asked President Barack Obama to send 40,000 more troops there. Senator John McCain was in favor of the surge, while Vice President Joe Biden argued for unmanned drones. Within days of Pakistan's announcing a new anti-Taliban offensive in Waziristan, the tribal area that borders Afghanistan, a suicide bomber dressed as a paramilitary officer blew himself up inside a U.N. aid agency in Islamabad, two car bombs killed dozens in markets in Peshawar, and ten gunmen disguised in army fatigues attacked the country's military headquarters, holding 45 hostages until a commando raid freed 42 of them; the remaining hostages and nine of the militants were killed.^{1 2 3 4} It was revealed that a young Afghan girl was killed last summer when a box designed to break open in mid-air and scatter public information leaflets fell intact from a British plane and landed on her.⁵ A British study found that children who are given too many sweets risk becoming violent adults, possibly because they never learn patience,⁶ and President Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize for his “extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy,” even though the deadline for nominations was February 1st, ten days after he took office.⁷ Searching for water, the United States bombed the moon.⁸

Government ministers in the Maldives, which rising sea levels will make uninhabitable by 2100, were taking scuba lessons and practicing hand signals so that they can hold cabinet meetings underwater.⁹ The government of Ecuador was expelling migrants in the Galapagos because environmentalists fear that the human population, which doubled to 30,000 in the past decade, and which has introduced rats, cattle, and fire ants to the island, threatens native species, among them giant tortoises and brightly colored boobies.¹⁰ A Saudi man was sentenced to five years in prison and 1,000 lashes for bragging about his sex life in an interview on Lebanese television.¹¹ Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi vowed not to step down after the country's highest court overturned a law granting him immunity from prosecution. “I am the best prime minister ever,” said Berlusconi, who is embroiled in corruption and bribery scandals. “I am absolutely the politician most persecuted by prosecutors in the entire history of the world throughout the ages.” He added that he had spent “200 million euros on judges... excuse me, on lawyers.”¹² The Supreme Court convened its new term, and Justice Sonia Sotomayor asked 36 questions in her first hour; Justice Clarence Thomas had not asked a question for more than three years.¹³ British entrepreneurs launched Internet Eyes, a program that allows registered users to monitor live feeds from some of the United Kingdom's 4.2 million surveillance cameras in order to search for a crime in progress, with cash prizes for viewers who spot the most criminals.¹⁴ Insurgents in Somalia forced thousands of people to watch as they amputated a foot and a hand from each of two men accused of robbery.¹⁵ House Democrats pledged to write into health-care-reform legislation a ban on the practice whereby some insurers deny coverage to battered women because domestic violence is designated a “pre-existing condition.”¹⁶ A Sioux City, Iowa, family found a dead deer dressed in a clown suit and wig on their front porch.¹⁷ British scientists reported that learning to juggle can permanently increase brain function, and Cirque du Soleil founder Guy Laliberte returned to Earth, after a visit to the international space station, wearing a foam clown nose.^{18 19}

Astronomers discovered the largest ring in the solar system, a colossal circle of debris around Saturn caused by the planet's moon Phoebe having been hit by wayward space rocks.²⁰ Archaeologists announced a new stone circle a mile from Stonehenge that suggests the prehistoric monument was part of a larger burial complex.²¹ U.S. coroners were reporting a sharp increase in the number of unclaimed bodies due to the recession.²² Florida hospital officials advised more than 1,800 people to get screened for HIV and hepatitis after a nurse was found to have re-used IV bags on multiple patients.^{23 24} Scientists announced that they had developed a vaccine that prevents cocaine users from getting high.²⁵ France's new culture minister, Frederic Mitterand, was called on to resign after acknowledging that he “got into the habit” of paying young boys for sex in Southeast Asia.²⁶ Egyptian lawmakers called for a ban on the Artificial Virginity Hymen kit, which leaks fake blood,²⁷ and on National Coming Out Day, thousands of gay-rights activists marched on the U.S. Capitol.²⁸ Mary Cheney was pregnant again.²⁹ A teddy bear made of placenta was touring England as part of an exhibit of sustainable toys.³⁰ The Mediterranean Sea was plagued by an outbreak of giant, mucuslike sea blobs.³¹