Scared straight

From the rules for clients of Refuge, a Memphis-based rehabilitation program run by Love in Action, a “Christ-centered ministry.” The Refuge program caters to adolescents “struggling with broken and addictive behaviors,” including sexual promiscuity and homosexuality. Clients live at home or in a hotel with a parent or guardian and usually participate in Refuge for two weeks, with the option of a six-week extension.

only be used when absolutely necessary. Safekeeping clients are permitted to say “hello” and to communicate enough information to be courteous in public interaction (mostly in the client’s church setting).

Any client may be placed into Safekeeping at any time, at a staff worker’s discretion.

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Love in Action wants to encourage each client by affirming his/her gender identity. Therefore, any belongings, appearances, clothing, actions, or humor that might connect a client to an inappropriate past are excluded from the program. These hindrances are called False Images (FIs). FI behavior may include hyper-masculinity, seductive clothing, mannish/boyish attire (on women), excessive jewelry (on men), mascoting, and “campy” or gay/lesbian behavior and talk. Clients should report all FIs, whether their own or another’s, to staff.

Small unhealthy habits can either reflect or lead to dysfunctional, life-controlling habits. All clients must maintain appropriate hygiene, including daily showering, use of deodorant, and brushing teeth twice daily.

Men must remove all facial hair seven days weekly, and sideburns must not fall below the top of the ear. Clean, businesslike haircuts must be worn at all times. Hair must be long enough to be pinched between two fingers. Women must shave legs and underarms at least twice weekly.

Fresh undergarments are to be worn at all times. Men may not wear any jewelry other than a watch and a wedding band. Women may wear a pair of simple earrings (one earring per ear). Clients may not wear Abercrombie & Fitch or Calvin Klein brand clothing, undergarments, or accessories.

Men: Shirts are to be worn at all times, even while sleeping. Bikini-style underwear is prohibited.

Women: Bras must be worn at all times, except while sleeping. Thong-style underwear

is prohibited.

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While on the campus, Refuge clients must be “in phase” at all times. A client is “in phase” when he or she is with two or more other clients, one of whom must have been in the program for at least eight weeks.

While in the program, clients may have no contact with anyone involved in unrepentant emotional dependencies or inappropriate sexual behaviors. Clients may address off-limit persons they inadvertently encounter with a polite “hello” only.

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On-Level Rules

On-level is a protective and therapeutic measure that is sometimes implemented between clients who are having relational difficulties.

On-level clients may not speak to each other unless there is a potentially life-threatening emergency.

On-level clients are to spend no time alone with each other.

On-level clients are not allowed to ride in the same car unless permission has been granted, in which case one must sit in the front of the car and one in the back.

On-level clients, whenever in the same room, must always have exactly one person between them, whether sitting or standing.

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Total silence time at home begins at 9:00 P.M. Lights-out time will begin each night at 10:00 P.M.

Refuge clients are allowed a one-time fifteen-minute maximum closed bathroom door time for shower/grooming purposes. The only other closed-door alone time allowed is for using the rest room.

Refuge clients must keep their bedroom doors open at all times, day or night.

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Refuge clients must be with at least one parent or guardian at all times when off-campus. They may not enter any restaurants with bars, even when accompanied by a parent or guardian. Clients must be accompanied during any trip to a public rest room.

Clients are not allowed to visit any video, music, or media stores that are not expressly Christian, even if accompanied by a parent or guardian. Clients may visit LifeWay Christian stores with a parent or guardian.

Clients may only read materials approved by staff. No television viewing, going to movies, or reading/watching/listening to secular media of any kind, anywhere within the client’s and the parent’s/guardian’s control. This includes listening to classical or instrumental music that is not expressly Christian (Beethoven, Bach, etc., are not considered Christian).

No access to malls of any kind.

All new Refuge clients will be placed into Safekeeping for the initial two to three days of their program. A client in Safekeeping may not communicate verbally, or by using hand gestures or eye contact, with any other clients, staff members, or his/her parents or guardians. In case of a practical need, Safekeeping clients may write down their question or request. Writing may only be used when absolutely necessary. Safekeeping clients are permitted to say “hello” and to communicate enough information to be courteous in public interaction (mostly in the client’s church setting).

Any client may be placed into Safekeeping at any time, at a staff worker’s discretion.

Men: Shirts are to be worn at all times, even while sleeping. Bikini-style underwear is prohibited.

Women: Bras must be worn at all times, except while sleeping. Thong-style underwear is prohibited.